At the end of May I found myself on summer break from Substitute teaching and out of the job that I loved, somewhat abruptly, and I was very unhappy about that. Thankfully I had the Teen pagent to distract me the first week, but after that, I sank deeper and deeper into unhappiness and dispair (wow what a dramatic phrase!) I was depressed, barley left my house binge watching Netflix. (I did discover Downton Abbey.) I spent this two months job hunting online, doing dishes, and doing “nothing” with my kids and the dog. Today I woke up and realized that even though it has been and is financially TOUGH, this summer hass been a gift. A gift of time spent with Jacob, who is not working either.
We have watched countless movies and tv shows, played endless games of Mexican Train and Risk. We had a Harry Potter marathon and a musical marathon. We drank massive ammounts of coffee, had many talks, and we have laughed. Jacob made a slip and slide and I watched my 19 and 17 year olds “play in the sprinkler.” I am so thankful for this time and looking back I can’t help but wonder if I was totally present in those times. I have been so consumed with grief over my “lost” job , missing my church kids, and not getting the job I really wanted that I haven’t looked at this time as a gift. I am going to trust that God has contrtol of the situation. He will lead me to the job I am meant to have. I will strive to not worry, Wish me luck on that!